DUDE! She snubbed me! THAT B!-OTCH SNUBBED ME?

wanna hear a story about a fair weather friend? there is a considerable amount of blitching.

today i went to Barro's with my fave gals. at the far away Barros. in enemy territory.

enemy because an old friend, who shall not be named has been seen there, she always snubbs my fave friends.

TODAY THE WITCH(with a b) SNUBBED ME?!

here's the background-

she used to be my friend. pretty much my best friend, and best couple friend for a long while , imagine that. her husband happened to be Lance's best friend growing up. but they could ONLY hang out when she wasn't being a BITCH. crappy friend and ignoring that we had been friends, and she'd always been the one pursuing it. our kids were friends, and yet if she was off, the kids suddenly couldn't be friends either. and yet every week for years they played together?

once in a while she just ditched me. for 6 months or more. sometimes longer.

THEN! every time i got pregnant, she was suddenly NOT MY FRIEND! with no explanation WHATSOEVER!

it was a big loss for the kids. it was a big loss for the husbands, it was hard on me.

then after the kid came,(she usually happened to have one around the same time, so i don't know what her issue is) she'd want to be my best friend again. HOT AND HEAVY.

girls nights out, as couples, with the whole family.

every day she made plans , and was really determined that i only hung out with her.

so that went on 2 times. after my #5 kid, she came back hot and heavy yet again. and yet by now i was NOT BUYING IT!

this time i limited it. and didn't let the kids get together. it wasn't fair to them , they didn't know why suddenly they couldn't play with their "best friends" . so things were ok for a long while but i wasn't overly invested in this friendship.

Then before i got pregnant with Pierce(#6) , i had to deal with my cancer crap again, and suddenly this friend was TOO BUSY!

too busy to return calls, too busy to email. and her husband was too busy too.

well at this point i don't need her, and I'm not taking her crap so i wrote her off.

when she happened to call the week i was in Isolation(after my surgery, and after my radiation) she called with some LAME A$$ excuses that she's just been "so busy", and she's been helping her friend in her ward whose husband has cancer and on and on, excuse after excuse.

meanwhile I have freaking cancer, 5 kids 6 and under, and Lance is a full time student! I know what busy is, and imaginary busy just to make yourself feel important doesn't freaking mean crap to me at that point. she's thinking her lame excuses mean CRAP TO ME? because they didn't .

I'm sorry but if you are friends, even if you are busy you can return a call or call once in a blue moon. and when you finally call, don't give me your lame ass excuses why you've been too busy to be a decent friend.

like "I'm so busy with taking the kids to piano lessons, and scouts, and on and on, all my bull crap that i make up to do.

IT doesn't mean CRAP!

when you are busy, going to Dr. appointments every week and the lab, and shuttling kids to multiple schools and preschools, and your husband is gone day and night and working on the weekends. and you are doing it all alone with CANCER, with a pack of crazy kids.

that. is. busy.
obligatory busy. HAVE TO DO IT BUSY!

and i still had time to call.

it wasn't unnecessary fluff, that is totally optional. she had a cell phone, she used non stop. she could have called while waiting in carpool pick up, or while grocery shopping. she didn't . she couldn't be bothered.

SORRY! KISS MY ...@$$! i don't need lame excuses.

so anyway. that's where the falling out happened. i was sick of her being a crappy friend, i realized she was never going to change, (she pulls the same crap with her sisters, and other friends), HOT AND HEAVY, and then dumps you cold turkey with no reason that you can figure out. just never returns calls, or screens your calls and doesn't answer, she NEVER says anything that would give you a clue as to why she just dropped you like a dog drops a steaming log of dog crap!

FINALLY, I realized it was her. not me. and I moved on.

we went out as couples once a couple years ago. she wanted to get back to doing stuff all the time again, wanting to make plans and i didn't make myself available to her to do that to me again.

our husbands have done lunch occasionally since they both work from home, it's just as easy to get together and do a working lunch. they are welcome to go out together to a game, or a movie.but not with whole families again, and not with me.

seriously i have other friends, i have sisters, i've got blog friends, i've got ward friends,I have bunko friends, i have loads of friends, I'm good.

i don't need fair weather friends.

i don't need crappy friends.

i don't need drama from my friends.

so today we were sitting at lunch (me and my fave friends ) and she came in, sat in the same room as me for over an hour, and TOTALLY SNUBBED ME!

sure i could have said hi, but my back was to her, i could have easily just not known she was there,(except my friends told me she was, but she always snubs them, so it was nothing out of the ordinary about that.) but i got up and took care of kids, and walked around, she saw me, and said NOTHING.

what a freaking B!tch!

funny thing was, i didn't even recognize her youngest kid. i doubt she recognized Hope, i haven't seen her since Hope was a baby. she hasn't ever seen Pierce.

i swear the whole time she sat there, I'll bet she was judging me for Pierce wearing his rocker tee, and jean shorts un-tucked, with sandals.

She was judging me for not having him dressed in a polo tucked in with a belt, and his hair perfectly groomed, like she dresses her son. (who is entirely too effeminate these days. i'm sorry but let a boy look like a boy. and let him be a freaking kid! SHEESH!)

well we wear rocker tees. and we don't tuck. and we act like kids. and we aren't always perfect anymore.

guess what? i don't have time for BITCHY FAIR WEATHER FRIENDS!

now you know!

MORAL OF THE STORY? be a rad friend to the friends you have. don't make lame ass excuses for being a lame ass friend. especially when their life sucks way worse than yours. and there is nothing optional about it.

DISCLAIMER: if i've been a crappy friend to you (recently or in the past), i'm really sorry. i'll try a little harder to be a little better!

just so you know my theory on this, the phone works both ways. and if you are the one that does all the calling and you suddenly stop, i'm probably not going to suddenly start calling you, and i'm not psychic. i figure you just don't want to talk to me if you don't call.

there we go. understood? 'cuz that's how i roll!

I'm just sayin' !

Hope you have a rad day.

I'm having lunch with friends tomorrow. and going on a DATE!

© 2009 crazymamaof6