Wednesday, September 17, 2008

random trivial thoughts of the day, a holiday funk ALREADY, a little self analysis,

CHRISTMAS is 99 DAYS away! holy freaking crap! how did this year fly so quickly. why haven't i saved money this year for it? i had the best intentions, and spectacular ideas for doing that. and yet, i have NOTHING saved.

I. AM. SCREWED.

to add to my stress? between now and then...

we have:

  • Liberty's birthday
  • Halloween
  • Peyton's birthday
  • Thanksgiving
  • black Friday shopping
  • Lance's birthday
  • Paxton's Birthday
then, thrown in for good measure...
  • birthday's for siblings.
  • 2 bunko groups plus gift exchanges
  • Family christmas parties.
  • enrichment classes
  • class parties and teacher gifts
  • general daily stuff. and standard emergencies.
HOLY CRAP! this is the time of the year i start feeling FRANTIC. and also the reason i start planning on Halloween right after school starts.

note to self- Halloween prep-
  • pick up harry potter robe from Janie- for Peyton's costume
  • find Halloween costume boxes
  • find and distribute costumes I'm loaning out
  • find Halloween decorations
  • buy wings for Liberty, and Joy. and face paint for Hope.

Liberty's birthday is in 18 days. OY!

we are quickly on our way to having TWO 9 year olds !
they are the same age until Peyton turns 10 in November.(that is Lance's fave time of the year for the shock value. do you have twins? nope. are we sure we don't just come off like idiots? bragging about that? yes, i do know where babies come from. and yes we finally figured out how to time that whole thing better. )

I must get an idea of what they want and buy gifts. Paxton too.

i SHOULD plan my holiday crafts and budget right now. so i don't feel like a failure later in the year for lack of planning, lack of fun traditions, and lack of budget. i SHOULD.

but , "the best intentions of mice and men are both worth just about as much."

i see myself as a "TYPE A" perfectionist. but i severely lack follow through- i'm a procrastinator, with major adult ADHD but with my perfectionist plans, and procrastinator tendencies i can't start something unless I ...

1st feel the perfect amount pressure to get it done

2nd have the perfect conditions meaning time or money to do it as fabulously as i want it to be/imagine it could be.

3rd the perfect gumption to workload ratio.

if i have too short of time/money, and i don't bother even starting since it surely won't be half as fabulous as i want it to be so why bother, and too much time i mentally plan the perfect project, buy the supplies, start and get distracted and give up because i lack the pressure. which generally leaves me getting nothing done. or starting too many things at once and spreading myself too thin. i have a habit of getting hopelessly overwhelmed.

i am often hopelessly overwhelmed.

but i'm getting better at it. admitting the problem, and accepting responsibility for my thoughts and actions does help. Medication does give me focus. and decreasing my expectations for myself and kids plus a healthy dose of perspective in the eternal scheme of things and really it's so much more bearable and WAY more realistic.

i assume the clarity and self realization came with a combination of age, trials , and experience.


admitting it is half the battle right?

So that's where my thoughts are today.


do you have any magnificent thoughts? feel free to share them!

I Hope you have a spectacular day!

post signature

15 comments:

sandi said...

It's "funny" you're panicking about these things today; I am also having similar thoughts. Between now and Christmas we have Todd's birthday, then of course Halloween and Thanksgiving, then Allie's birthday, my birthday, my mom's birthday, plus the family holiday parties (gifts for each family). And also nothing saved for it all! WHOO HOO!

Hautemama said...

Oh my, we are sooo alike. I second everything you just said.

michelle said...

It was fun to see you today. I wanted to mention to you, your hair looked darling! I love the cut!

I also am begining to freak out a little over the holidays. I think I need to sit down, and make a plan. That in itself is scary! I have to start sometime though! :)

Mamarazzi said...

oh how i love the little trips through your brain. you are always awesome like that, sharing your thinks with the rest of the world.

thanks for that.

i am starting to panic too...so i am avoiding it all together by doing a major purge. everything has got to go...really, i am. check out the post i made at 4am.

HUGS! hang in there...i know your holidays will all be FABULOUS, cuz that's how you roll!

Jenifer said...

Nope on the magnificent thoughts...I get all my sibling gifts at Super Saturday. Love Super Saturday. And I have waaaay cute back as the years have gone by. Simplify. Of course, I only have two kids. I don't know how I would be able to handle all that you do. Good luck.

SuperCoolMom said...

Plans, yes. Panic, yes. Follow through, some. Money, none. 99 days, UGH!!!

Vidal's Nest said...

I hear ya! We have anthony's birthday, Eric's,then mine. Plus..buying for 10 kids does us in! Tony wants to go to Calf for christmas and I told him sure...if you can crap some money I am in!
I always worry and it is stressful but so far things have always been OK at the holidays. I just wish i could enjoy them without the stress of money!

Claremont First Ward said...

I have a thought. Is Christmas really that soon? If so, I'm up a creek too. :)

ZB said...

99 days? Wow, that's like years for me. I am a horrible Christmas planner. I have serious problems. I need a personal shopper....that would bring their own cash, moola!

Jyl @ MommyGossip said...

Is Christmas really only 99 days away? That is crazy. I can't even believe it, although I did see the worker bees setting up the Christmas aisles when I was at Kohl's today. Oh! My! Gosh! You are right. It is right around the corner. I have got to start on my cards. I never get them out on time.

Thanks for spreading the stress! Hee hee! ;)

lifewithquads said...

I've been trying to drive the same panic away this week. We have halloween, in November is the kids' birthday party, out of town company for a week, Thanksgiving (we go out of town for that), a 9 day conference the first week in Dec. and somewhere in there planning for Christmas. I can't even get into the birthdays for everyone else. GAAAAAHHH! Oh yeah, and we're trying to go cash only so that just freaks me out even more. lol - Hope you get it all together....I'm just trying not to think about it. :0)

Wendy Phelps said...

I think some of your Halloween decorations our out in our storage unit :) It is a stressful time of year. Ben is trying to help by pus\h'nin\g buttons.

Shannon said...

You have me stressing about Christmas now. I like to hand make my gifts and I haven't even started. At least you have halloween planned. Way ahead of me there. I almost bought the girls little butterfly "costumes" from Old Navy just to get it done. They are warm but they just look like a sweat suit with wings. How boring is that??

Cecily R said...

Seriously? 99 Days? Holy CRAP!!!!! I don't even have real plans....I am SO in trouble.

And I second Mamarazzi. I LOVE these Julie Brain Trips...

Cara @ Gardenview Cottage said...

You sound like ME!!! I just did a post on this very subject!!! Great minds think a like I guess. Go see my holiday planner guide. Maybe it will help. But I hear ya, funds are going to be streched!

Crazymama's RAD Followers

Get up and dance!


do you ever feel like............

do you ever feel like............