Thursday, January 13, 2011

back on the wagon

I started taking my Prozac again. It can take up to 2 weeks to kick in.

Maybe I should have started 2 weeks ago.

Or instead of stockpiling my prescriptions ( I have a horrible habit of forgetting to actually take my meds) maybe I should just remember daily and stay in a pleasant state of numbness where I can tolerate anything .

It really takes the edge off.

Whiny/crying kids.

Annoying voices/sounds.

Kids bickering.

Constant messes.

Not to mention I don't worry about the state of our finances or current events/ world disasters.

I figure it's a good time to be back on the wagon.

I'm hoping I'll stop being a screaming Meany.

And it will be in full effect before my postpartum depression kicks in.

Because that is inevitable.

Not to mention it will help me deal with the stress of the hubs being gone and suddenly being a single mom while he travels for work.

Luckily I will get breaks while they are in school but the mornings and evenings could get scary.

At least I can run to the grocery store alone still since the big kids can babysit.

I need a constant amount contact with my kids because too much time away and I can't tolerate the noise and annoying behavior
When I come back. Even a long nap can be too much time away.

I don't think I could ever take a real vacation. Sure I'd miss them but holy crud they get needy and miss me so when I come back they won't leave me alone, climb all over me and whine in my face or just all talk my ear off at the same time. It's sensory overload and huge shock to anyones system.

Imagine it's Like front row seats to a monster truck rally, 3 ring circus and WWF smackdown, plus sitting right next to the speakers at a concert featuring your least favorite music of all time all rolled into one.

It's that good. You see why I am back on the wagon.

Prozac the breakfast of champions.

(I saw that on a shirt when I was 18)
Something that rad sticks with you forever.


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3 comments:

Cynthia said...

A Mom's gotta stay sane one way or another! I wouldn't let my spouse live without his 'happy pills'- why be miserable if you can be numb?

Kate Collings said...

Well done for noticing that you needed to and being responsable to go back on Prozac. It is definitely a difficult decision to make, one way or another.

I am trying the natural way for once but am struggling too. Doesnt help that I'm quitting smoking once and for all which was my substitute for my cocktail of calmers.

I need to do it though for my son. Afterall he was such a little miricle I should be a better mummy for him. :-) Thinking of you xx

Mamarazzi said...

drugs...it is what happy mamas are made of, sometimes. whatever works dollface, whatever works!!

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