My confusion about 'boy flirting' is all cleared up,finally!

The other night shopping with Liberty ,

we had a discussion about how boys at this age show that they like girls.

at our house we call it 'boy flirting' .

Ladies? did that happen to you? back in the day?

Guys? if you teased a girl what did it mean?

you know , when they get their friends, and chase you down, then kick you in the shin?

steal your ball.

or just chase you for fun.

or they poke you and tease you all day long.

or they stare at you,

or act really nice to you, and ignore every other girl.

it all adds up to BOY FLIRTING.

she's on the verge of boy crazy,

i'm afraid.

she's very self confident. which is great.

now me on the other hand? i never understood boy flirting EVER.

(teasing,taunting, annoying boy flirting)

i was married before i got it. the hubster had to dumb it down for me. and i admit i doubted his assertions on that point.

In High school I was so insecure, sincere compliments were instantly discounted.

and guys teasing me to show me they liked me, just made me think they didn't like me.

~~

so i wrote the beginning of this post last week, after shopping with Liberty. (you can read about it here)

and i decided i wanted to confirm my suspicions.

so I facebook messaged my old 'friend' that teased me pretty much everyday of my junior year.

(here i am on the first day of school.(i was 16 myJr. Year))

the reason i messaged this friend? To see if the whole boy flirting theory was crap? or true.

he called me big bird.

because i wore this bright yellow sweatshirt. (this was pre-fuschia obsession ,it was totally rude because i was TALL. i'm 6'2" and was probably 6'1" back then and was fine with wearing heels. )

he mocked me.

he punched me in the arm.

put me in a headlock.

bugged me, teased me and annoyed me.

he did ask me to Homecoming casually in class, and prom too.

but seriously if a guy didn't do the whole huge showy display in asking, there was too much risk in being stood up. especially if i thought he was being mean to me every day.

so i didn't take it seriously, i did however explain that to him at the time, but he never opted to ask me further.

so when i got asked by other guys in the big showy way. i went with them. not thinking he was serious about taking me.

we went out exactly ONE TIME on a date (that i'm pretty sure i asked him on) where we bickered the whole time, to the point (i think) he made me cry.

but we still ended up making out. (somehow a lot of my dates ended that way)

we made out one other time after that.

then apparently he gave up during the summer, i just figured he didn't like me anymore. or maybe he never did.

senior year , he wouldn't give me the time of day.

so i really thought he wasn't into me EVER .

how was i to know him being mean meant he liked me?

according to his message back. on facebook.

he was teasing me because he thought that passed for FLIRTING.

he was apparently TOO INTO ME. to the point that i drove him crazy.

so he was tired of trying to figure it out and hook up with me.and gave up.

Oh (best part) he said I was 'sexy as hell' . (YAY ME!)

oh and i guess he still had a bad taste in his mouth about how things didn't work out.

boy flirting. in highschool. obviously doesn't work.

or it didn't work for me anyway.

i have to say it's flattering to know he thought i was hot.

(i had no idea that i was hot with my SERIOUSLY low self esteem)

and he thought he wasn't being mean , he even apologized for being mean and teasing me.

he seemed to think that i played hard to get. or was a tease.

but i stick with my assertion that

I WAS NEVER A TEASE. and I DIDN'T PLAY HARD TO GET! EVER!

in fact i was overly forward. so? how does that add up to 'hard get'? or being a tease??

just because i didn't get his caveman version of showing me that he liked me? well that's not all my fault.

but still SUPER FLATTERING that he still resents the fact that things didn't work out.

and here for all these years i thought NO GUYS at my High school liked me.

now i know at least one did. it's good to know.

so i had to admit Lance was right: boys that tease girls, like them.

and someday i'll dumb it down for my boys that: GIRLS LIKE BOYS that Are NICE (but not too nice.)

and if you don't make a move , and ask her out or kiss her, she's probably not going to make the moves for you.

that doesn't mean she's playing hard to get, it means she's waiting for you to make a move.

IF you never make a move, you have no one to blame but yourself.

and i'll make it known to my girls that boys are dumb, and they might just like you even if they tease you constantly. because boys d0n't bug girls they aren't interested in.

i have to say it's nice to have that cleared up.

i feel so much better. how about you?

P.S. if there happens to be some random ex boyfriend lurking here, wanting to state his opinion. feel free to comment. sign your name. or email me.

other guys that happen by are welcome to comment too. if they have opinions on boy flirting.

it's nice to finally hear the other side of the story.

DID YOU EVER HAVE A GUY DO THAT TO YOU?

did you think he liked you because of it?

or did you just think he was a dumb jerk?

© 2009 crazymamaof6