Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Interest free in baby-ville

i realized tonight, i have no outside interests.

outside of my family.

at least none that i can think of off the top of my head in conversation.

if i think about it too much i feel like it's pretty pathetic.

other people have careers, hobbies.

ya know, outside interests.

i don't garden. I'm not political. I'm not overly religious.

i like to read but don't have time for it anymore (honestly the books i read aren't really conducive to discussion in casual conversation anyway.)

I'm not a fan of cooking for pleasure.

I'd love to be into decorating if i had money.

crafting has gone by the wayside.

shopping? it's a delightful hobby but again, money is a necessary component to that delight. while we have sufficient for our needs for the most part, i don't have spare money floating around. besides, shopping includes buying and bringing more into my cluttered, crowded home. which at this point i am resisting.

i do enjoy blogging and social networking, yet saying those are my hobbies makes me feel somewhat socially retarded , like my only interests involve following my imaginary friends on my computer and hunting for exciting ideas for things that i won't actually follow through on.

I'm at a loss right now as to what my interests are.

partly i think this sudden loss of conversational outside interests stems from...

the fact that I've moved back to baby-ville and can't remember what i used to do and think about before this little person made his appearance into my world.

even though I'm semi-pro at being a stay at home mom, I've decided that being a mom of 7 kids now, oddly enough feels more like when i only had one kid, except more tired.

I'm exhausted.

lugging around the stinking car seat. holy cow i forgot what a burden that thing is. and buckling the little bundle in and out 65 times a day.

it's not like a kid that keeps running in and out the back door with friends that you can say, IN OR OUT? you choose and just do it, (then banish the kids to the back yard).

i have to put him in to drive the kids to school, then come home and take him out to feed and change him and snuggle him, in again to go somewhere, he fusses in the store so i take him out and carry him, then back in, then into the car, then out at home then in here, and out there, then in and out all day long.

maybe i should stop going anywhere, and get a hobby? (besides watching TV while i hold the baby).

then I'm back to the realization that i have no outside interests. (at least they aren't interesting to anyone with REAL hobbies or interests. or to people that have careers and don't currently reside in baby-ville.)

It's all about the kids, and the baby. and some of the hubs work thrown in

and i have....nothing?

I'm not a fan of exercise. i confess my thoughts on exercise are more like....

"EXERCISE? I thought you said Accessorize!"

(which by the way i found at a store on a notepad and i super love it. it suits me.)

bunko is only once a month. it takes no skill or intelligence but it's social which i love.

being a new mom is sorta hard.

i feel disconnected from my friends.

i feel trapped by the less delightful aspects like fussiness and the mystery demands from a person who can't communicate.

i am completely absorbed in the daily aspects of taking care of a baby and 6 other kids.

i mean, i can regale you with a tale about my 4 and 6 year olds behaving poorly at the superstore, to which i muttered OY VEY to myself as old people gawked at me, which triggered the kids to chant OY VEY, OY VEY as they ran away down the aisle.

while it was horrifying and hilarious at the same time it's just another daily tale of motherhood.

i just realized as i typed those last few words..."another daily tale of motherhood" that even as I struggle daily with the ins and outs of my reality.


sure I'd love to have exciting interests to discuss, but this is all I ever aspired to.


i wanted to be a Mom. a stay at home mom. I'm blessed to have children. I'm blessed to be able to stay home.

isn't it funny how all these words had to be typed out to work through those thoughts and realize I'm right where I've always wanted to be.

if i have time for casual reading , GREAT!

if i hunt down amazing bargains, or craft up something truly delightful it's just a bonus added to my already FABULOUS LIFE!

when I go back to school again, i'll have something to discuss and add to conversation, and by then, I'll lament missing out on sitting around snuggling my baby all day and keeping up on my shows.

Popular= the inability to sit alone, anywhere,EVER!

Everytime i've got kids climbing all over me, fighting who gets to sit closest, I tell the hubs..."i'm so popular".

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© 2010 crazymamaof6


Mamarazzi said...

love this post and super love that typing all those words made you remember that you are living the life you have always dreamed of.

i wish i loved closer, i know i say that a lot but we would find some fun and i would love to help you with the daily grind whenever the hubz is out of town.

next time he comes to SF you come with him. we need to play!

CassiB said...

LOVE.THIS.POST!! And can I just say I can't wait for the train to pick me up and take me to babyville. It's ALL I think about! 2 more days!! Good for you realizing you are a success, and have achieved your goal! Sometimes it's hard to see that we are accomplished women, alot of times I feel like I've gotten nothing done, when really I've been helping my children grow and honestly that's all I ever wanted to do. Even now if you ask me what I want to be when I grow up, I'll give you the same answer as 20 years ago, "a mom" I used to think the reason for my answer was that I just didn't know. But now I know that is the right answer for me. <3

Kimm said...

Did you hear this talk in Conference? I loved it! You are being selfless now, taking care of 7 very important people that are our future generation!


Serendipity said...

Well, what I read does not come up while chatting with friends...lol...and I've often felt the same. BUT I think you underestimate you talent of the social world. Your blog is amazing and entertaining and you have the followers to prove it. You are like an instant party . I adore you and think you are one awesome person!

Eliza said...

I feel the SAME way! It's so easy to feel sorry for myself when life gets hard and then sometimes I have to remind myself that I am living the life that I always dreamed of and wanted. Glad you could share this. Hobbies, schmobbies, who needs hobbies when you've got kids, there will be time enough for that later. Just cherish your baby he will soon be grown and gone to school, too. And uh thanks cuz now I'm so not looking forward to lugging that carseat around everywhere again!

Tracy said...

I love your honesty! So true for me also. I have lost my style also. I grew my hair out so I could do more with it.. I pull it back in a pony everyday! I don't where the cute girls find their cute clothes cuz I feel like a pair of brown shoes around a bunch of tuxedos! You have a very important job, and the most beautiful kids. Hang in there!

jayna said...

and it has been way too long since i've been around... life has gotten the best of my time. (more like work has gotten the best of my time.)

wanted to stop by and see what you were up to. you have achieved success! love it! who needs random interests? :) you are raising 7 kids. hats off to you.

ps, as far as interests, you could actually say 'writer'. you have a great style with it, you know.


Julie said...

Ah! I could so relate to EVERY word you wrote. I, too, am more popular than I could ever have imagined. Who would've thought,
I've literally created my own popularity, and I didn't have to be a mean girl to attain it.

Thanks for the reality check!
You Imaginary Friend ;o)

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