i realized tonight, i have no outside interests.
outside of my family.
at least none that i can think of off the top of my head in conversation.
if i think about it too much i feel like it's pretty pathetic.
other people have careers, hobbies.
ya know, outside interests.
i don't garden. I'm not political. I'm not overly religious.
i like to read but don't have time for it anymore (honestly the books i read aren't really conducive to discussion in casual conversation anyway.)
I'm not a fan of cooking for pleasure.
I'd love to be into decorating if i had money.
crafting has gone by the wayside.
shopping? it's a delightful hobby but again, money is a necessary component to that delight. while we have sufficient for our needs for the most part, i don't have spare money floating around. besides, shopping includes buying and bringing more into my cluttered, crowded home. which at this point i am resisting.
i do enjoy blogging and social networking, yet saying those are my hobbies makes me feel somewhat socially retarded , like my only interests involve following my imaginary friends on my computer and hunting for exciting ideas for things that i won't actually follow through on.
I'm at a loss right now as to what my interests are.
partly i think this sudden loss of conversational outside interests stems from...
the fact that I've moved back to baby-ville and can't remember what i used to do and think about before this little person made his appearance into my world.
even though I'm semi-pro at being a stay at home mom, I've decided that being a mom of 7 kids now, oddly enough feels more like when i only had one kid, except more tired.
lugging around the stinking car seat. holy cow i forgot what a burden that thing is. and buckling the little bundle in and out 65 times a day.
it's not like a kid that keeps running in and out the back door with friends that you can say, IN OR OUT? you choose and just do it, (then banish the kids to the back yard).
i have to put him in to drive the kids to school, then come home and take him out to feed and change him and snuggle him, in again to go somewhere, he fusses in the store so i take him out and carry him, then back in, then into the car, then out at home then in here, and out there, then in and out all day long.
maybe i should stop going anywhere, and get a hobby? (besides watching TV while i hold the baby).
then I'm back to the realization that i have no outside interests. (at least they aren't interesting to anyone with REAL hobbies or interests. or to people that have careers and don't currently reside in baby-ville.)
It's all about the kids, and the baby. and some of the hubs work thrown in
and i have....nothing?
I'm not a fan of exercise. i confess my thoughts on exercise are more like....
"EXERCISE? I thought you said Accessorize!"
(which by the way i found at a store on a notepad and i super love it. it suits me.)
bunko is only once a month. it takes no skill or intelligence but it's social which i love.
being a new mom is sorta hard.
i feel disconnected from my friends.
i feel trapped by the less delightful aspects like fussiness and the mystery demands from a person who can't communicate.
i am completely absorbed in the daily aspects of taking care of a baby and 6 other kids.
i mean, i can regale you with a tale about my 4 and 6 year olds behaving poorly at the superstore, to which i muttered OY VEY to myself as old people gawked at me, which triggered the kids to chant OY VEY, OY VEY as they ran away down the aisle.
while it was horrifying and hilarious at the same time it's just another daily tale of motherhood.
i just realized as i typed those last few words..."another daily tale of motherhood" that even as I struggle daily with the ins and outs of my reality.
THIS WAS ALL I EVER WANTED.
sure I'd love to have exciting interests to discuss, but this is all I ever aspired to.
I HAVE ACHIEVED SUCCESS!
i wanted to be a Mom. a stay at home mom. I'm blessed to have children. I'm blessed to be able to stay home.
isn't it funny how all these words had to be typed out to work through those thoughts and realize I'm right where I've always wanted to be.
if i have time for casual reading , GREAT!
if i hunt down amazing bargains, or craft up something truly delightful it's just a bonus added to my already FABULOUS LIFE!
when I go back to school again, i'll have something to discuss and add to conversation, and by then, I'll lament missing out on sitting around snuggling my baby all day and keeping up on my shows.
Popular= the inability to sit alone, anywhere,EVER!
© 2010 crazymamaof6