Thursday, February 28, 2013

The housewives of....

(bear with me through the first part. try not to be offended if it applies to you. i have a point eventually)

Sometimes I joke about the ladies from the town next door and refer to them as "The Housewives of Gilbert."

A town full of neighborhoods filled with ladies who intimidate me.

They are all stereo-typically skinny.

Lately all of them are sporting chevron maxi skirts, or colored skinnies, chambray oversized or chiffon ruffled shirts layered with June cleaver cardis and are dripping with "statement Jewelry" whether real or imitation.
They wear heels to grocery shop, or Toms.

They sport lots of  MAC make-up.

All of them carry big purses, some are authentic and others boutique finds.

 Most have highlighted hair  and/or wear it long with pornstar curls in their extensions.

It seems like everyone has eyelash extensions.

They are seen around town driving big nice SUV's. They can be found "at the gym" or what i assume is freshly back from the gym because they are still wearing their gym clothes at school drop off and pick up time, mostly they are showing off their super trim bodies. because they look too perfect with their hair done or make up on.

Their pinterest boards are full of amazing decorating, party and craft ideas. Their Homes are spotless and their children are all dressed to the nines and involved in numerous extracurricular activities.

ok so that sounded kinda harsh. I know I've offended a few of my bunko divas for making blanket statements like that.  Who are in fact Gilbert housewives. which I never intended. I love my bunko divas.

I know ladies like this live everywhere. Utah ladies? California girls? There is a pocket of these ladies in my own neighborhood. across the street even.

Have I gotten to know them? not yet. but by appearances sake they look like the ladies that scare me. Like they might not accept me, because well, I'm me.

I hear tell the ladies in my neighborhood aren't nice or friendly. It was proven when no one even brought us cookies when we moved in.

ding ding! right there, not welcoming us into the 'hood? HIDEOUS!

I will tell you, I'm going to be extra nice to our new neighbors because I just don't want them to feel unwelcome.

Now since we moved in I've felt intimidated by the ladies here, it hasn't really gone away. I've thought about it and analyzed it. We've discussed it at bunko and it was discussed on FB.

I have let this worry steal my joy for too long.

Time for a little self realization. I do my best thinking here on the blog (whether it offends someone or not, this is about me today.)

The reason they intimidate me is because I am jealous and insecure. NEWS FLASH!

Seriously though, sometimes it's because I'm not skinny. hello, haven't I accepted that fact yet?

how many years have I let that fact steal my joy? I will tell you...23 years. 23 years I have struggled with how much I weigh, not so much the actual weight but how I perceived myself. the actually poundage doesn't matter if when I was so skinny people spread rumors I was anorexic. That isn't the case now but, even when I  was really truly thin, I let the numbers on the scale rule how I felt about myself. I had unrealistic expectations.  I compared myself to my friends and magazine  models.

 Eventually I've gotten closer to accepting myself. I still struggle especially if I'm comparing myself to others, fast forward to now...

Why should I compare myself to them(these ladies)? I'm pretty sure they might have made some assumptions about me, like I have about them. whatevs.

Time to move on. give it a chance or let it go.

So all those stereotypical statements about the Gilbert housewives? While some may be true, it's not all these ladies are. Just like I'm not just a fat lady in a skinny world. I am fabulous.

Not just  the skinny ladies are stereotypical housewives.

I confess I am rocking a June Cleaver cardi right now, my chevron maxi dress is hanging in my closet. Now that I knocked the colored skinnies and chambray, I confess I've been on the hunt for the right pair. Oh and I'd get lash extensions in a heartbeat.

My designer purse is huge and expensive and my statement jewelry was probably handcrafted by myself or a loved one.

So what I wear or don't, doesn't matter and what they wear and do with their time doesn't matter.

I just may not fit in because I'm too cleavage-y, I have too many kids and I don't freaking care what people think about me.

Maybe that's just it.

I'm not one to go with the flow and blend in. I stand out. people either like me, or they don't.

My beloved Gilbert housewives at bunko told me that once these skinny Mesa housewives get to know me, they will love me.

I've come to realize, if they don't it's OK.

I am an original. There is no one like me. (ok so there are some really close copies out there, don't be fooled if you see one of my sisters.)

 let's be real {whispering behind my hand in your ear} I'm the most fabulous one. 

The cookies from the neighbors isn't a big deal, I guess I just didn't realize how great and friendly my old neighborhood was. 

 what do you think of the bubble statement necklace trend?

How do you feel about colored skinnies and chambray shirts making a comeback from the 80's/90's ?

What kind of ladies intimidate you?

What do the housewives of your town look like?

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© 2013 crazymamaof6


CassiB said...

I heart you! I feel the same way. You know me, I'm not in to skinnies or chevrons, or bubble necklaces, I'm jeans and tshirts erryday. I don't know anyone in my hood yet except the one chick I grew up with, but I don't go to church lately so I never see her. I've been to our new ward once, an I got the feeling they are similar to the Gilbert wives here. In our neighbor hood, they all come home, open the garage, and drive in and shut it. No one brought us cookies except the bishop, but that was after we'd lived her a month and hasn't shown up to church yet. I have days were I really miss my old place, where I knew everyone and my shyness had already faded away, now it's brand new. As far as the number thing with weight I don't have that figured out for myself. I too was considered anorexic in my skinny days. I actually smiled when Maddy's weight went above mine at her age-just because it means she won't be accused of not eating or worse purging. I think the reason I'm jealous of those Gilbert housewives isn't because of their stuff, or their bodies or their perfectness, but it's their confidence that I lack. Thanks for posting this!

CassiB said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jill said...

I have realized that everyone has their crap even the curled hair bomb shell. And pretty much always I'd rather have my crap than theirs. So embrace your weight, your cancer tales, your crazy kids--and screw the cookies.

Janna said...

I totally understand... and it's the same here in Idaho.

I live on "everyone is rich and molly mormon street"

We are the outcasts. Working at the school I see teenage drama everyday and come to realise it never goes away, just changes with $...

And laugh when I know the bishops daughter, my neighbor's kid, is making out in the halls at school.....

Susan said...

Everyone is intimidated about something...everyone has their issues to deal with.

*Don't even know what a bubble necklace is.

*Colored skinnies look darling on my girls. For me its a dark blue or black. The end.

*I am intimidated by ladies that are fun and have strong and loud opinions. I am always afraid of saying something dumb.

*We have those kinds of housewives even here in YUMA. The shallow ones don't bother me. There are amazing I have it all together ones...good, amazing and sweet as well as fun, cute, beautiful. I sometimes allow myself to get fluster around them. As I get to know I always do...they all have their own crap to deal with.

You my friend-are amazing.

Cara @ Gardenview Cottage said...

Julie, a couple of things, 1) I was a little offended when you said all of this at bunko. Now that I've read your post, I'm not offended anymore. I completely understand.
2) turning 40 was the best thing for me and my self esteem, it made me not care. Oh sure, I still want to dress cute and have a cute house, and cute kids, but it's all for one else. I'm not in competition with anyone anymore. I do what I want when I want to. It's great! 40 is fabulous!
3) In church a few weeks ago the speaker made a very profound comment that I loved: if you think so and so has everything - "you don't know them", if you think "that" family is perfect and you are comparing yourself to them, don't. "You don't know them". You don't know what is going on with anyone else but you and your family. We shouldn't compare because it only hurts ourselves. You are fabulous! Own it! (which you do) I love that about you♥

Amy said...

It's this way in Utah too. I have to admit, even as an almost lifelong Utah resident, I don't fit in. And honestly, I don't want to. Somedays, I just want to hang out in sweats...and so I do. I have 1000 other things to do in a day than perfectly curl my hair, pick out a perfectly matched outfit with all the right accessories, and all the other crap that goes along with it...

I'm just me and if someone doesn't like me? I honestly don't care. The older I've gotten, the less I care.

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